Well, Cool; After-Dark Version

Purple and Orange. Bears.

2011-11-14T20:29:00.001-08:00

I woke up this morning at 4 in the a.m. Jared had just gotten into bed and therefore got to hear a snippet of my dream. This is what I told him,

Me: There was a purple bear, and an orange bear.
Jared: What?
Me: Bears. Purple and Orange. They were chasing me.
Jared: Er. Weird.
Me: Yeah, they told me they were tame. They were not. Purple and Orange. Bears.
Jared: Go back to bed.

I don't think I will ever be able to go camping. My fear of bears is too prominent in my dreams.

Fish

2011-06-22T06:59:00.000-07:00

Do you remember that episode of Full House where Michele got a pet fish and then her fish had babies? I had a dream very similar to that. I dreamed that I was at my parents house, and got the fish fever. I used to get the fish fever often as a kid and would REALLY want a fish. So I would gather all the money I had, fish (har har) for coins in the bottom of my dad's closet, until I could get one of those $1.50 gold fish. I loved that. Anyways, so back to the dream. I got this old aquarium out from under the bathroom sink and started filling it up with water. I carried it into my parents room and put it on their dresser to look at it while I went searching for coins. When I put it down, I noticed a fish swimming around in there. It was so bizarre (even to dream me). But I figured, the fish was in there and went into hibernation when we last used the tank. Now that there was water, it came back to life. It was pretty exciting, but I had no idea what kind of fish it was. I went and turned on my parent's computer (which takes FORever) and came back, and there were two fish. The second fish was all bloated and creeped me out. And then out of no where, it started pooping baby fish. Millions of them. The water in the tank starting frothing and bubbling, and overflowing. I was freaking out because it was in my parents room, and my dad would flip. So I went in to the computer room, looked at facebook (tried to think of a really good status, but nothing came), and then went back. The birthing process had finally finished, and there were SOOOO many babies. I woke up and pondered what I was going to feed the fish.

Vegas Baby.

2011-05-10T14:58:00.000-07:00

Man alive. I haven't posted on here in SOOO long. Reason being that pregnant dreams are really insane, and best not to be shared. However, since then, they are still quite freaky. Last night for instance, I was driving some friends home from a quick trip to Payson. What we did in Payson is still a mystery. On the freeway, I decided to take a new off-ramp. It turned into a dirt road. Bears were roaming on the sides of the road, and there were buffalo kicking it in the fields. The friends and I were just talking and singing to music, you know not paying much attention. When all of sudden I noticed that we were in Las Vegas. I flipped when I saw how far we went, thinking we would run out of gas, but the tank was still full. I called Jared, but my parents ended up showing up. And we rode roller coasters.

Just say no

2010-10-22T09:42:00.000-07:00

I think I heard before that pregnant women have really weird dreams. I had really weird dreams before I was pregnant. So, you can IMAGINE the insanity that unfolds when I close my eyes. I sort of feel like Alice in Wonderland when the caterpillar starts smoking the stuff. Or when Dumbo gets drunk and there are bubble creatures dancing about him. And in every single dream, without fail, there is someone whom I have had very little association with, or have not seen for at least 7 years. The main reason I am not indulging you by sharing my dreams is that they have been really violent. We don't have cable, only an antennae, which gets maybe 3 channels, and all they show are those murder-CSI-figure-out-who-the rapists/serial-killer-is-in-time-before-someone-else-is-brutally-murdered-shows.

I am thinking that we should not allow our children to watch disney movies. They are kind of creepy.

Pretty sure this could be Avatar 2

2010-07-12T11:10:00.000-07:00

So now that the cat is officially out of the bag about little fetus, I can now blog about my weird pregnancy dreams. NOW, you thought my dreams were bizarre before?! WEEEE dogggy. I wish I had written them all down, but alas, I thought it would be a little strange seeing as how most of them involved me having a baby and then hilarity ensued.

Now for last nights dream.

My mom was at the zoo with Jared and I. The zoo keepers led us all back in to the back where the zoo is no longer attractive, but dirty and where the cages open...which is not my favorite. But it turns out that my mother was in the market for a puppy. She said we could help pick it out. There were so many varieties and pretty much all of them were small and adorable. My mom decided to pick out the very smallest dog in the whole place. How small are we talking? Chihuahua? No. It was the size of an ant. Basically it had just fallen out of the dog and the zoo put it in a cage to sell. It was so weird. My mom was laughing because there was no way to know how big the little larvae of a dog would be when it grew up. And then she dropped it. It was like when you are looking for a contact in the carpet. No fun. I eventually got it, but was worried I squished it when I picked it up. I put it back in the cage and we moved on to the furry normal sized puppies.

And in true dream fashion, I was suddenly lead into another room which contained a hospital bed and my mother on it. And there was an empty bed for me. I started panicking. What the heck is wrong with my mom? She was just playing and laughing with the ant dog! So I went to the doctor, who was the actress from Glee (er I don't really know her name or anything, because I don't watch Glee, sue me), the short haired older blonde lady who is mean? Anyway, I was yelling at her to tell me what the heck was going on with my mother, and she bolted out of the zoo. I chased her all around the place (and considering she was in a truck labeled zoo, and I was just running, I did awesome catching up to her) and we eventually ended up in front of the rec center at Provo High. She said,
"Well, since I can't shake you off, I guess I will let you in on what is going on with your mother. We are putting her brain in another body. We have begun a program to breed humans but we only perfected the shell, so you mother volunteered her brain. And since you are mother and daughter you are part of the experiment as well, to see if normal interactions are the same after transplant."

Now, since I am so clever, I agreed. I went back to the zoo with crazy lady, and she led me back to the place and showed me the whole process of this 'so called' human breeding program. There were babies, toddlers, and so on until we reached the adult section. CREEEEEEPY. She pointed out which one was my moms. And then said, you can pick from those three, unless you want to be a man. I declined manhood. I had a plan to foil the whole thingy by unplugging the machine that made it all work, but I couldn't did find the plug.

And then I woke up.

Ring of Fire.

2010-05-31T15:02:00.000-07:00

So, last night I had a super bizarro dream.
It started out in a huge gymnasium. Sort of like a convention, but my dream left out the part of why I was there and what the convention was about. Micquel and I were walking out of the gym and there was a table with free stuff. Do you guys remember those nuskin bags we would get in elementary? Made of like nylon?

it took me forever to find one similar to it.

They had those but super small. I was considering using one for my scripture bag. They had bags and free lip balm. Awesome. Well, some guy in front of us grabbed like 50 of everything and started booking it. Micquel and I looked at each other and shrugged our shoulders. What an idiot. What is he going to do with 50 nylon bags? Well, the convention workers were pretty po'd about it. They asked us if we knew the guy who stole the stuff. We didn't. They didn't believe us. So, this super short girl who had short brown hair started walking inbetween Micquel and I, and grabbed our hands and handcuffed micquel and I together. ODD. The handcuffs had a long chain holding us together, so we were, more or less, tethered together. As we walked out of the gym (because people were pushing us), we were met with a crowd surrounding us. The started pushing us toward two guys swinging a jumping rope. One of the guys was the guy who stole the stuff. The short girl stood in front of us and started threatening us, "We don't believe you. You will go through the obstacle course from hell." Aye Caramba! We got shoved in front of the swinging jump rope. It was one of those plastic ones that really sting when you get slapped with one.

Micquel went first and jumped right through. I had to go because we were tethered. But I didn't want to jump. (*and for some reason the chain didn't stop the swinging rope). So I just kind of shuffled into the rope and yelped from the pain of it hitting me. Next we were faced with a little alley way of hot burning coals. But they were big coals that you would have to jump over and climb over. We were allowed to wear our shoes, but Micquel was wearing flip flops and didn't want to get them ruined. So she took hers off and started galloping off into the coals. I had thick Nike shoes on so I headed into the fire. It still burned, but I ran through that thing like nobody's business. When I got to the other side, Micquel's feet were fine. And she said, "that was fun! And exfoliating."

Stick to the rivers and the lakes you are used to

2010-03-07T20:00:00.000-08:00

You have probably given up on me ever writing on this blog again. I have had bizarre dreams involving saving the world from unemployment, and begging Jared for a pet llama but losing intrest in it when Jaba the llama decided to drink tea. But I noticed something as I was driving southbound on I-15. I always wake up with a song in my head. More times than I would like to admit it has been soul sister by train. This morning it was waterfalls by tlc. I asked Jared if he had a song in his head when he woke up, his was: No Diggity. We are made for each other.

Burgers and Dyes.

2009-12-16T12:33:00.000-08:00

I know it has been far too long. But as of late I have just been having wedding dreams, and school dreams. Boring. BUT last night I had a doozy of a dream. Have you ever seen the show Man VS. Food? Well, if you haven't, you NEED to. It is climbing the charts of my favorite show ever. I just love it. This guy takes on food challenges and eats. That's it. But it is hilarious. Hamburgers the size of Texas. Good times. Now on to my dream.
I dreamt that I had some evil organization chasing me around because I happened upon their secret solution for destroying the United States. They concealed the liquid to detonate something in a tube of Clearasil Benzoyl Peroxide acne medicine.I was running around, jumping through windows from the 4th story. It was really intense. And in the process of all this jumping and whatnot, I was squeezing the bottle really hard. It squirted out all over my hands, so I rubbed it into my hair. Who knows why. I was running, okay, there was no time to wash hands. I ran into a door to get away from the people chasing me and found myself in a beauty parlor. I asked if they had any appointments, because I figured if I was sitting in the chair being worked on the people wouldn't see me. Plus my hair was turning orange from the Benzoyl Peroxide. I sat in a chair and asked for some coloring-a light brown. A few minutes later my hair was being dyed blue. They reassured me it was because my hair was turning so light that they needed a different color base for the brown. Then the girl working on my hair decided to go for a latte run. Not for herself, but for everyone who wanted one. It was very strange indeed. Then Adam from Man vs. Food came and started putting stuff in my hair. We chatted, and I told him I was getting married in 4 days. He told me about some huge burrito he ate. It was really funny. The whole process took about 5 hours. By this time I completely forgot about the people chasing me. And they forgot about me. My hair was a bit darker than I wanted it, and they cut it short. But it was cute. I liked it. I think Man vs. Food should go to hair school.

Bleedy nose

2009-10-05T11:51:00.001-07:00

I have been having severely disturbing dreams lately, that I am positive none of you would like to hear about. Lets just say the movie Taken is creepy. But other than those weirdo ones I have been having this recurring dream where I am sleeping and wake up with a bloody nose. I can't figure out why or how and it bothers me a lot in my dream. Last week I concluded that I broke my nose while sleeping and that it miraculously healed. In real life I never get bloody noses. I have had maybe 5 in my whole life. One was after riding a roller coaster in Vegas (you can read all about that one on Well, Cool) and most recently was about a year ago. I woke up to find my pillow covered in blood. Perhaps this is where these dreams are coming from. I am still pondering how the heck I got a bloody nose in my sleep and didn't notice.

Under the Sea

2009-07-23T21:19:00.000-07:00

The other night I dreamt that my roommate Sariah and I were swimming in the ocean. She dove down and when she came up she wasn't breathing or swimming. I went in panic mode and gave her CPR. However we were still swimming, so it was kind of awkward. I had to do chest compresssions from behind and give her air through an empty water bottle. I thought she died and started crying and just gave chest compressions to try to get the heart to start and get the water out of her lungs, when all of a sudden..................she farted. And I knew she was alive.

Meaty.

2009-06-18T13:44:00.000-07:00

So this is kind of sick. But you know how I don't like cake or pie? Well, for my wedding I decided that I wanted a meat loaf cake. With mashed potatoes as the frosting. It looked really good. We just had to get creative to keep the cake warm. WEIRD! What is even weirder is that people have actually made meatloaf cakes before. WEIRD. kind of sick. Kind of good? I don't know. I am still undecided. But here is a beauty for you to admire. Should I have this be my wedding cake?

twinkle.

2009-06-08T13:58:00.000-07:00

I have been having dreams about weddings lately. My dream wedding I suppose. Let's see if I can do an awesome google search to show you what I see in my dreams:
So pretty much ignore everything in this picture except the canopy. I dreamed that the wedding was covered with white lights and a canopied ceiling. Is that a weird way of saying that? Meh, it is pretty. That is the only big decoration I want. Lots of pretty lights.

snow in april

2009-04-22T07:42:00.000-07:00

I haven't been having too many bizarre dreams as of late. But last night I dreamt that I Ali and I were out driving the Lumina and everytime I had to brake we would almost hit the car in front of us. I was getting really teed off, because I KNEW that I wasn't reacting slow, I was hitting the brakes at the appropriate time (*in fact I remember saying that over and over "I hit the brake at the appropriate time!"). Anyhow, All of a sudden a freak snowstorm hit as we were heading down a hill. I started to panic because I knew the brakes were all messed up. Of course the car in front of us slammed on their brakes, so I swerved out of the way, hit the brakes and Ali and I ended up wedging the car into a large pile of snow. We didn't flip the car, but it was stuck on its side. Ironically enough, this large snow bank was right in front of my house. And my mom came running out with a fancy camera. I was a bit shocked. Why would my mom take the time to get the camera if she saw what happened?! Well, if that wasn't bad enough, as Al and I went into the house, she ran out and said, "Your first accident! How exciting that it happened right in front of the house!"

WEIRD!

Dirty Laundry

2009-03-20T14:24:00.001-07:00

This is not an official dream. In fact it is one hundred percent reality. After getting only 3 hours of sleep last night I rolled off of bed to get up and get ready for the day. Well, my coordination and balance are not quite up to par normally, but with sleep deprivation I found myself in the laundry basket. I rolled INTO my hamper. I then laughed myself silly for at least 15 minutes.

Pass the Danish

2009-03-04T08:12:00.000-08:00

My dream last night: My dad was trying to convince me to go meet the Danish royalty that was taking up a semi-permanent residence in Park City. My first thought was, "Does Denmark have a king and queen?" Really, I think they do...but weird. My response was, "Sorry Dad, I can't. I have a clogged nostril." Which when I woke up, was true, and therefore a completely valid excuse.

No Booze Here!

2009-02-26T22:47:00.000-08:00

On Tuesday night I was having a really tough time staying asleep. It was awful. Those of you who have lived with me, or know me really well, know that I don't wake up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night (sorry if that was an overshare). But I did just that on Tuesday night. This is all to illustrate how bizarre this night was. OKAY, so here is the snippet of a really weird dream that I remember. I woke up and wrote down the dialogue that was just spoken in my dream... Here goes:

Scene: 1920's during the infamous Prohibition days. Two men are confronted by a police officer on the street under a lamp post. One man is very sick (if you catch my drift) the other is patting his buddy on the back and speaking with the officer.

Officer: What in tarnation is going on here? Is this fellow under the influence? That is punishable by law you know...

Man: Oh officer, of course he is not under the influence...he is...under the influenc....under the influenza! Yes, he has influenza, and quite a bad case of it, as you can see. No booze here!

The end.

How the heck did my brain come up with the origin of the word influenza? That is just crazy. What in tarnation?!

The chair and the guitar

2009-02-22T23:47:00.001-08:00

This here blog is going to be the chronical the bizarreness of my dreams. I know on the normal version of "Well, Cool." I have shared some of my dreams. My friends, this is just the tip of the iceburg. The Titanic has a lot more to worry about with this blog. I am going to write up the dreams as I remember them. Include pictures where necessary. It is going to be great. And spectacular. And crazy. And will probably invovle David Bowie ALOT. Because that is how I roll.

Here is what I remember from my dream last night. Might as well jump in, right?

I went to a fancy store. I can't remember if it was Bed, Bath and Beyond, or like Tai Pan Trading? Whatever. It was fancy and I don't go to these places for various reasons (NOT my style...). So, I was walking around looking at the foofy stuff that I know my mom would really love, but that I could care less for. As I walked to the front of the store I found this swivel chair, not of high quality. It was one of those kneeling chairs without a back.

I don't even know how the heck to use of those things. But I was pretty enamored with it. The price of it was precisely $19.99. I thought to myself, "hmm, not bad, 20 bucks for a chair". I was SOLD when I found out that the chair doubled as a guitar stand. You just had to rearrange it a bit. So, I picked one up to purchase, the black one, because I am always drawn to black first. I stood in line and as I stood there I debated over the color. I really do this in real life, such a dumb decision puts me in agony, especially if I end up making the wrong choice. Anyways, I was nearing the front of the line when I had a moment of inspiration, "If I am going to use this weird chair as a guitar stand I should get the red one, because my guitar is black. And I really want my guitar to stand out, because it is so good looking." I promptly left the line and put the black chair in the a completely different place in the store, I don't really know why. I went over to the chairs and grabbed the last red one. It was not very pretty, it was the "Try Me" one so it had some wear and tear. I was pretty upset about that. I like my things to be pretty and shiny when I put my money into it. I was having such a hard time because the black one was new and untouched by other peoples butts and knees, but the red one would be the better choice for my guitar, which was the ultimate reason I was buying the contraption in the first place. I sat there for, seriously 50 mintues. Exactly. Ended up buying the red one. And then the dream ended with me scrubbing the red one clean with my guitar sitting by my side.